Take it easy universe. I think I’ve learned enough lessons to last me a lifetime.
I saw this quote on Instagram the other day and at first I thought nothing of it. It wasn’t until a few days later that it popped into my head. In my last post, I talked about how one of the most important things I learned in therapy was to find the lesson in everything, especially through tough moments. I would give myself a B+ at doing this, maybe even inching towards an A, but this last week I was doubting myself big time. I was taking inventory of the things happening around me and tried to focus on what I was learning but kept striking out.
In this moment, I thought really hard about the above phrase. And I’m not going to lie, I had a few, “why me” moments this past week. I vented and vented to those around me about how I was feeling. I remember saying, “I know I’m going to be okay but right now I don’t feel okay.” It’s easy to look around you and see where other people are in their life and compare their journey to your own. I’ve gone through a lot in my life (side note: that’s why I have so much to blog about) but this past week made me wonder, will life always be this hard?
My life is good but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel pain. It doesn’t mean I face every adversity with a smile on my face. I’m human, just like you, and life affects me. And it isn’t easy. There’s been a lot of pain and hurt in my life and in moments where I’m facing challenges, it can easily bring me back to that time.
When I was venting to my sisters I wrote in all caps that I was sick of people telling me, “it’ll be okay” and “it’ll happen when it happens.” I was feeling defeated and I knew a cliche phrase wasn’t going to suddenly shift my perspective.
And here is where life surprised me again. I learned a lesson in this moment. My sisters said the best thing they could’ve said to me, “your feelings are valid.” “We’ll get through this together.” “You are strong.” That was all I needed to hear.
Life isn’t easy and we are never going to have it totally figured out. But what has helped me so much in moments of sadness is to communicate exactly how I’m feeling and let those around me put me back together. They can help me when I’m confused on which path I should take. Even though I’m ready for some easy paths of life, I know I’m equipped to learn the lessons it has to teach me as well. Because the biggest thing I’ve learned is I don’t have to have it all figured out. I don’t always have to have a smile on my face. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to feel confused. And it’s okay to lean on others.